no-1532789_1280How freeing would it feel if you were no longer paralyzed by the thought of someone saying NO to you? Wow, imagine that. 

Imagine if you could get to the point where NO, no longer stopped you in your tracks.  Better still, what if you could get to the point where you actually welcomed the possibility of hearing NO, as a gauge for growth?

Some experts believe that if you aren’t hearing NO at least once a day, then you’re not trying hard enough.  I love this concept.

I love the idea of actively pushing the boundaries every day until you get a NO. 

Megan McArdle in her book The Up Side of Down; Why Failing Well is the Key to Success, offers this advice in the August 2016 issue of Success Magazine; “ Failure feels bad precisely because it’s the way your brain says, ‘HEY DON’T DO THAT ANYMORE.’ ”

I think the block for most of us is that we see getting a NO as some sort of a failure.  Sure it may be a disappointment or an inconvenience, but we don’t have to frame it as a failure. And we do NOT have to take it personally.

What if…going forward…you invited opportunities to hear NO? What if you made a game of it?  The challenge: To get at least one NO every day.

Experts call this “Exposure Therapy” (no trench coat required). The more you expose yourself to NO, the less power it has to block you. Check out the website RejectionTherapy.com for more information. It was created by Jason Comely who says: “The underlying philosophy of Rejection Therapy is sort of Zen; It’s about not being attached to the outcome.”

By continuing to exercise the NO muscle, we become more and more acclimated to the fact that NO is a natural part of life and not inherently a failure.

In my 30 years as a Comedian, Success Humorist, Speaker and Author, I have learned to celebrate the No’s, as well as the Yes’s.

You have to learn to get past NO, if you are going to accomplish anything of value on this planet. So suck it up, grow a spine and get out there and get your share of NO’s.

Go beyond not fearing NO, actually make friends with the word NO. Invite it to tea. Seek out a “Nay a Day.” When you no longer fear NO — anything becomes possible.

Here is one of my favorite quotes from artist Brian Andreas;

“In my dream, the angel shrugged and said if we fail this time it will be a failure of imagination and then she placed the world gently in the palm of my hand.” 



Karyn Ruth White is a Success Humorist, Keynote Speaker, Author and Comedian. She is the proud owner of Laugh and Learn Productions, LLC, a company helping people work and live with more joy and less stress. Karyn Ruth is a woman who prides herself on not taking NO for a final answer. Visit www.karynruth.com, info@karynruth.com.